What's in that Goblin's Pocket? d100 Items on a Goblin
Whether your group of adventurers are obsessed with hoarding as much random ‘treasure’ as possible, or just like teasing their troubled GM and asking about every random object they come across, below is a list of 100 odd, funny, gross, and strange items a Goblin might have on their person.
d100 Items on a Goblin
1 | A small lizard covered in sticky tar and tied to a long stick with a bit of string. The goblin claims it is for ‘fishing’ for larger monsters.
2 | A small rucksack filled with rocks that have been obviously gnawed on like a bone.
3 | A common potion. Roll 1d4: on a 1 or 2 it is a potion of healing, on a 3 or 4 it is a potion of climbing)
4 | A crudely drawn portrait of a goblin, on the back is a set of poorly drawn lips.
5 | The flag of the local nation. It is being used as a handkerchief and is covered in snot.
6 | A baby’s pacifier, the goblin had used it recently.
7 | A broken shard of a mirror.
8 | The bone of a wolf, it has been sharpened into a fine point and is used as a tooth pick.
9 | The goblin’s favorite wooden drinking mug. On the bottom is the goblin’s name “Cobleg” scratched into it.
10 | A small IOU written in terrible handwriting on a beer-stained napkin that the goblin owes Bagbarth: 20 silver pieces, a golden tooth, and an old hiking boot.
11 | A tuft of llama fur covered in earwax.
12 | A deed for an outhouse behind a local tavern. The signature is missing for the purchaser, but the seller has already signed it.
13 | A broken wand. Once per hour a creature can attempt to Cast a Spell from the wand. Roll 1d4: 1) it sprays harmless black sparks, 2) it sets a random object within 15 feet of the wielder on fire, 3) a copper piece appears, 4) the wielder sneezes uncontrollably for 1 round.
14 | Ten 1-foot long sticks tied together into a single, 10-foot long pole.
15 | A petrified frog wrapped in cloth like a mummy.
16 | A small kitten wearing a fake eyepatch. It mews hungrily for food.
17 | A goblin-curry recipe. It doesn’t look half-bad, even if the ingredients are… peculiar. You’ll need a chocolate cake for the sauce.
18 | A book of dirty jokes written in goblin.
19 | A magic scroll with the prestidigitation spell scribed on it. Scrawled along the margins are instructions in goblin on how a non-spellcaster can cast the spell and make someone fart with it.
20 | 1d20 copper pieces
21 | An uncommon potion. Roll 1d4: 1) potion of fire breath, 2) potion of resistance, 3) potion of greater healing, 4) potion of growth
22 | A carved, wooden figurine of a hippogriff.
23 | A bent and worn fire poker.
24 | A perfectly round and smooth black orb. It feels cools to the touch but smells terrible.
25 | A small bag filled with all sorts of feathers from different creatures.
26 | A set of fine nobles clothes covered in dried puke. The goblin claims that it won the clothes in a game of cards.
27 | A random card from a deck of illusions. The goblin thinks it is just a shiny gaming card and a good luck charm.
28 | A chipped teapot filled with hard biscuits and weevils, which are the goblin’s pets. The goblin has named all of them, but forgets which is which.
29 | A packet of drugs that the goblin was just holding for a friend.
30 | 1d12 copper pieces
31 | A great, big egg. The goblin claims it is a dragon’s egg… or an ostrich egg… or maybe it was a dragonborn? The goblin forgets such things.
32 | A fine necklace covered in specks of dried blood.
33 | A small tin of stale cookies. All of them have one bite taken out of them.
34 | The goblin is wearing dozens of rings, from fine gold to plain wooden, no rings are duplicates in style or size.
35 | The goblin’s armor is made out of dog bones.
36 | An old, cracked flute. It still plays perfectly.
37 | A tobacco pipe filled with a terrible smelling leaf.
38 | An adult human’s pointer finger. It looks like it was bit off.
39 | A bundle of parsley tied around a stick. The goblin claims it can be used to ward off ogres with its terrible smell.
40 | 1d10 copper pieces
41 | A full set of Snarecrafter Tools and a hastily scribbled outline of how to make a pit trap (with a helpful diagram of a stick-person falling into the trap).
42 | A large, dead gold fish.
43 | A full set of hobgoblin teeth. They still have bits of gum and blood on them.
44 | A wooden figurine of a donkey. It has “ass” carved into the side of it.
45 | A wineskin filled with a highly flammable liquid.
46 | A skeletal hand and arm held together with string. When you pull on one of its bones in the forearm, it causes the hand to close or open.
47 | A crown made of twigs and animal bones. The goblin believes they are a shaman over nature.
48 | A piece of tapestry that depicts a massive hoard. The goblin claims it is part of a treasure map.
49 | A rare potion. Roll 1d4: 1) elixir of health, 2) potion of superior healing, 3) potion of diminution, 4) potion of heroism
50 | 1d8 silver pieces
51 | A bit of string tied around a rock. The rock is wet.
52 | A door knob, with no door.
53 | An iron cooking pot that the goblin uses as a helmet.
54 | A wolf cloak that may have fleas.
55 | The goblin has an oar it uses as a quarterstaff.
56 | An empty potion bottle. It smells like sulfur.
57 | A pocket full of pie. It’s very hot.
58 | A tube of lipstick that the goblin has been very obviously eating.
59 | A set of brass knuckles.
60 | 1d6 gold pieces
61 | A jar of honey with added pickles.
62 | A bird’s nest that holds two eggs in it.
63 | A star-shaped gem.
64 | The goblin wears a fancy cape with a flower motif.
65 | A wooden stick that the goblin claims is a powerful wand.
66 | A set of silverware.
67 | A chunk of star metal.
68 | A bar of soap that the goblin uses to threaten other goblins with.
69 | A highly detailed and erotic drawing of a goblin. Roll 1d4: on a 1 or 2 it is male, on a 3 or 4 it is a female.
70 | 1d4 gold pieces
71 | A set of two worn and cracked dice that consistently rolls ‘3’s. See “Ettin Heads” in Gaming Sets for rules on how they are used.
72 | A goblin skull that it used as a drinking stein.
73 | A keg of some, off-colored alcohol that smells suspiciously good.
74 | A stuffed owlbear toy. It is worn, but well-loved.
75 | Three-fourths of a magical wand. You might be able to repair and fix it.
76 | A heavy training weight that has been obviously chewed on by a goblin.
77 | An assortment of different colored berries. The goblin claims that they cast a spell to make them bestberries. They’re like goodberries, but way better.
78 | An orc-sized codpiece strapped to its head as a helmet.
79 | A once-beautiful wedding gown that is now used as a rag. A character who spends a downtime day and either is proficient with weaver’s tools or uses prestidigitation and mending may be able to restore it.
80 | 1d3 electrum pieces
81 | The goblin is carrying a small ‘ooze bud’, a small and rubbery cube. This is the ‘baby’ of a gelatinous cube and will eventually mature once it gets enough food.
82 | A book of spells. Upon further inspection, most of the ‘spells’ are just gibberish, however one spell will curse the caster and make it so that their eyebrows fall out until the curse is removed.
83 | A religious symbol of a goblin deity.
84 | A pineapple… on a stick.
85 | The goblin claims it has ‘moon dust’. It looks like silver powder, tastes kind of like cheese, and is very chalky.
86 | A scrap of parchment with a big, black X carefully written on it.
87 | A whole loaf of brown bread that is so stale that it has been incredibly hard. It hurts when used as a weapon.
88 | A whole wheel of cheese. The goblin uses it as a shield.
89 | A pet chicken with a string as a leash.
90 | 1 platinum piece
91 | A wig made of human hair, sized for a goblin’s head.
92 | A wooden mannequin’s head. The goblin sometimes talks to it and answers it as if it were real.
93 | The goblin is using a beehive as a hat. Sometimes a bee comes in and out.
94 | A full set of dice (d20, d12, 2d10, d8, d6, d4) and a piece of paper with random numbers on it. It looks fun if you like math.
95 | A full set of teeth, maybe elven, that are strung along a string like a necklace.
96 | A bouquet of dried, pressed flowers. They smell kind of bad.
97 | A large sack of goblin dog jerky. It’s not the worst thing an adventurer has ever eaten.
98 | An old, rusty sword that it uses for stirring a cooking pot. It is covered in old food.
99 | A strange bag, every time you reach into it, a random piece of junk or trash comes out. Trying to up end or flip it inside out doesn’t push anything out.
100 | A promotional gambling piece for a local casino. The gambling piece is worth 100 gold pieces but can’t be exchanged for cash. It can only be used for a high-stakes spin-n-win wheel where one of the ‘rewards’ is being stabbed with a magical sword.
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