Random Ramblings
This week, I wanted to get down some of the things that have been floating around in my head. I don’t think any of them could make an entire article by themselves, so I threw them together and called them Random Ramblings. There are opinion pieces, homebrew and maybe a rant or two.
Superhero Costumes are so Boring.
Halloween is coming up in a couple of weeks, and my kids are super excited. Costumes are being talked about, but we haven’t landed on any final decisions yet. My ten-year-old son plays D&D in an after school group and 14 year old my daughter does cosplay. She takes it very seriously, creating her costumes and doing her own special effects makeup. She went to all four days of GenCon with me this year and had a different costume for each day.
This is one of the designs that didn’t make the cut
They both know there are NO superhero costumes allowed. If they were younger and just had to go as Ironman or Wonder Woman I’d probably allowed it, but to date, there have been no such requests. For those of us old enough to have kids and for those you are young enough to dress up and go trick or treating, don’t be a schmuck and buy some cheap-ass $25.00 batman costume. You have enough imagination to play a fantasy game where you battle kobolds and demons, cast fireballs at your enemies (and sometimes party members if they don’t move) and describe in great detail how you landed the killing blow on the BBGE. If you can do that, you sure as hell can figure out how to make a ranger outfit or wizard costume. Go bold and become an orc…you may even have the green paint left over from that year you went as the skinniest hulk ever. Have fun with it, be original, and fuck the people that look at you and wonder, “I don’t get it. Which superhero did you dress up as?”
So when I get to the door of one of our neighbors and they ask my son, in that condescending voice, what his costume is, I’ll want him to say “ I am the great master thief Robilar! There is no treasure that I cannot steal!” I’ll chit chat with my neighbor for a minute or so, say our goodbyes and head off to the next house. Hopefully, we’ll be there before they realize my master thief has stolen all their candy.
Don’t be a Cheap Fuck (unless you have to be).
I’m fairly pissed off that the GM Binder Kickstarter stalled out at $50K. Yeah, yeah…I know that is a lot of money. But other Kickstarters pull in 2x that amount, and they don’t even have a viable product to show people. GM Binder has been around for a while, and they are planning on improving on an already amazing product. Dump Stat donated all the money we have made for the year (it wasn’t that much, trust me) and we both kicked in some personal cash. Why? Because we use GM Binder almost every single day and it’s the right thing to do. The people over at GM Binder have put a ton on time and effort into creating a product that is head and shoulders above what’s out there and if you are a creator, I’m willing to bet you’ve used it, and if you use it on a regular basis the least you could do is throw them a couple bucks. If you’re anti-Kickstarter because of the union issues going on there (Don’t get me started on this subject), they have a Patreon, and you can help them out that way.
Now, I get it. Lots of people cannot afford it, and I respect that. Between medical bills, crushing student debt, unforeseen expenses, or just plain old everyday life expenditures, your bank account always seems to end up negative every month. I’ve been there. The average person’s student debt these days is over double what it was in the early 1990s, but the unemployment rate was high then and no one wanted to hire a recent college grad like myself. Money was tight and every month was an uphill battle. I had the internal debate at the end of every month whether to pay rent on time or buy beer. Thank the gods my landlord was cool.
All I can tell you is that it does get better, and you should focus on eating, rent and paying the rest of your bills. Eventually, you’ll be in a place to throw a buck or two to someone or something you love. It may seem like you may never get to that point, but if I can get there, so can you.
Magical Eyeglasses, Needles & Stockings.
I enjoy going through some of the older books and magazines I have. It gives me inspiration for some of my homebrew, plus it’s fun to see the notes 14-year-old me wrote in the margins. My handwriting was actually legible, and the ideas weren’t as left field as they are today. Going through some old Dungeon Magazines, I got caught up reading Thiondar’s Legacy, more specifically, The Stone of Gul and Thiondar, a magical stone of great power and a terrible curse (1991, Dungeon Magazine #30, pg.42-67). This, in turn, led me to an old copy of Encyclopedia Magica Volume 1 (1995) and down the rabbit hole I went.
5th Edition is said to be a lower magic setting than the previous editions. Not sure if that is true or not, as any DM worth their salt can adjust the campaign and setting as they see fit. I don’t want to get into that debate in this column, but I will say that there are much fewer ‘official’ magic items in the game today. The number of magic items found in the DMG has been slowly decreasing over the editions, and while you can always find new and unique items in the hardcover adventure books, there just don’t seem to be as many as there used to be. Xanathar’s expanded upon the types of objects that could be made into magic items, but it still pales to early D&D. It’s so much easier to create and find homebrew items online, WotC cannot be blamed for reducing the overall number you can find in official print.
What struck me wasn’t the amount of items (and there was a lot), but the diversity of the magic items. We all love wands and swords, but how about Wings of the Dragon, the Hammock of Protection, or a Fire Eye Monocle? I had forgotten the wide variety of everyday things that were made into magical items of one sort or another. There were magical eyeglasses, powders, stockings, and cabinets just to name a few. Some objects only got one magic item to its name, such as the OG of all mathematical equipment, the Abacus (of Calculations). Others, like the Dart, got over two dozen magical items to their name. So don’t think you’re being all creative when you create a Flail +2. Go bold and give them a Blowgun of Wild Emotions and watch the hi-jinks begin.
Here’s a link to a couple of old school magic items I converted over 5th edition. Enjoy!
Speaking of Patreon….
Dump Stat has a Patreon, and we have awesome patrons. The problem is we have only a few patrons, but a few better than none. Trying to grow our Patreon is personally frustrating for me, and sometimes I want to pull out what little hair I have left. Stephen is the creative genius of Dump Stat. I wish I had 1/10th of the knowledge and creativity he does. His tools series put us on the map, his new series on the Planes is fascinating and informative, and his homebrew creations are amazing. That leaves me with the business side of Dump Stat which is a whole different beast, and I’m nowhere as successful at it as Stephen is on the creative side. I’ve owned a couple of businesses, some more successful than others, but this is more challenging than all of them combined.
I know it’s a personal bias, but I’ve researched other similar Patreons and the number of things we offer and the quality of our products is much better than most of the others out there. I know this may come off as arrogant, but I genuinely believe this. We offer a couple of private podcasts, monthly giveaways, and a plethora of homebrew. Have I mentioned how great Stephen’s creations are? And those are just a few of the things we provide to our patrons.
Is this a shame plug? Yep, but I’m also looking for feedback. Getting people to look at our Patreon is hard enough, let alone getting them to throw us a couple bucks. I’ve spent a lot of time reading about Patreon and talking to other people who have pages to find out what works and what doesn’t. I’ve talked to people on our discord, who are also a great group of people, to see what they might like to see that would entice them to join. The more people I talk to, the more I will learn, so if you have suggestions or constructive criticism, please share it. Stephen always says people will spend their money on what they want and you can’t make them spend it on us. I agree wholeheartedly with this statement, but I’m challenging myself to have people want to spend a couple of bucks on us.
The Smartest Person in the Room Always Loses
I’m always scared to talk politics, but here we go anyways. I caught the end of the October Democratic debates after our session the other night. Listening to them talk about health care, foreign affairs, and the inevitable take over of automation (which then leads to Skynet, which then leads to our robot overlords taking over the planet), I realized something that not only plays out in politics and at our table; the smartest and most knowledgable person in the room always loses.
The person on the stage that I felt was the smartest and most qualified to be the next President of the United States has little to no chance of winning the Democratic nomination. Why? Because they aren’t the loudest person in the room. People gravitate to the person who is willing to yell, talk over people and have the best soundbites, no matter how ridiculous their ideas are or full of shit they may be. This is what happens at D&D tables all the time.
If the player at the table who knows the rules and understands strategy isn’t the loudest at the table, all of their knowledge is for naught. The most aggressive person at the table can somehow ram their ideas down our throats every time, no matter how stupid and deadly their ideas may be. Does any of this sound familiar, whether in real life or in-game?
It’s hard sometimes, but a party should always try to work together. The loudest person may be your spokesperson for the party, but they should be relying on the information from the smart person, not ignoring them. Sure, you won’t always see eye-to-eye, but there’s a table full of people to debate and decide what course of action is the best for everyone. Don’t be held hostage by one blowhard who thinks he has all the best words.
Just some of the benefits we offer:
Access to our always growing Homebrew Horde
Vote on upcoming Deep Deep topics
Early access to Deep Dive and Rewind Articles
Patron-only 1-on-1 actual play podcast
Regular giveaways
More to come!
Header Art Credit - WotC
