Combating Burnout
I’ve been playing D&D on and off for over 35 years, and I still love the game. I skipped a couple of editions, as I played a few sessions of 3.0, never played 3.5e or 4e edition, but have been playing 5e for almost 4 years now. The problem is, I’m starting to find playing less and less exciting over the past couple of months. At first, I chalked it up to the state of the world we live in, as my group has been primarily playing online since the early summer (except for a few ill-advised in-person games, which we quickly ended). I’m not a fan of playing online, as I enjoy the social interaction and camaraderie as much as playing the game itself. No matter how hard I try, it’s just not the same.
As the weeks continued, I realized that was just a part of what was wrong. Everyone else seems to be having fun and enjoying themselves but for me. I was jealous. I found myself talking less and my play becoming apathetic. The second part of my statement is probably the worst since not only am I not having fun, but I’m dragging the rest of my group down with me. It’s frustrating, so I set off on a little journey of self-reflection and realized that I was burnt out.
I only play once a week but write every day for Dump Stat. We’ve got our Deep Dives, weekly articles, developing a new world setting and corresponding adventures, and various side projects. For those who dream of working on D&D in some fashion as a full-time gig, this probably sounds awesome, and it can be a struggle. Coming up with new material every week, keeping it interesting, and meeting deadlines is hard, especially after 2+ years. Even though it started as a hobby, we are making a go of it and treating it like a job. Again, it sounds fun, but unless you can sell a ton of product on DMs Guild or be the 1% with a huge Patreon following, money is always an issue. Insert shameless Dump Stat Patreon plug here.
My initial thought was this was probably the reason behind my apathy when playing, but I realized that, if anything, this should make me more excited about playing. By creating and writing with my target audience as the players, I constantly learn about fun and cool things to try in my current game. Did what I just wrote last week actually work, or was it good in theory but not in practice? Was the advice in someone else column all it was built up to be? These are all questions I get to answer when I’m playing. My latest obsession with writing about spells has driven me to want to play a combat control wizard, testing out the different ideas I have later written about and executing things I learned during my research. It will be my next character.
I’ve come up with a few ideas on how to reclaim my joy.
Play a new TTRPG
Even though you're having bad thoughts about D&D, it’s like a habit you just can’t quit. It may feel like an act of betrayal to try another TTRPG. Maybe you’ll feel guilty abandoning your party or asking them to try something new. It could be that you don’t want to take the time to learn a whole new system. Besides, you’ve spent so much money on books, dice, and minis. It’s hard to justify playing anything else.
I’m here to tell you that there’s no reason you shouldn’t try out a new TTRPG. These days, it’s all the rage to quit D&D and start playing a new system, especially the smaller ones, of which there are 100’s available to play. There is nothing wrong with jumping on that bandwagon, but let me add a caveat. Don’t quit D&D forever unless you are morally opposed or want to support those leaving in protest to the multitude of issues at WotC. I completely understand the reasoning behind not wanting to give WotC your time or money and 100% support your decision. That said, there is a reason it is the most popular roleplaying game globally and growing day by day since the release of the 5th edition. It’s easily accessible, the rules are quite simple, and it is easier to find a group of people to play with. The community is fantastic, and most people will help you learn the game we have all come to love. Grow the game by bringing in a diverse group of people who can spread the joy and excitement you felt when you started playing and actively and passively work against the gatekeepers, harassment, and discrimination. I’ve written many articles on these topics here, here, and here. Sorry…rant over. (Please note, these opinions are Chris’s only and may not reflect Stephen’s feeling on this subject.)
You won’t have to look far to find any number of TTRPG’s out there that are interesting and unique. Many are based on the d20 system with rules quite similar to the 5th edition if you do not have the time to learn a new ruleset. Some are well-known and quite popular, such as Pathfinder or Call of Cthulhu. Others are smaller indie games that few people have heard of or have a small cult following, of which there are too many to name. As a small creator ourselves, you need to check some of them and support the little guy. I suggest you search online to see what might appeal to you. Reddit has some great threads with various suggestions and people willing to tell you all about them.
I personally have tried out Pathfinder, which I enjoy, Starfinder and Star Wars. I’m also awaiting the release of the Root: The Tabletop Roleplaying Game, whose Kickstarter has raised over $600K. Don’t be scared to spread your wings and give one of them a try. Worst case scenario is you have to play a few before you find one you like.
Talk it Out
You hear about issues at someone’s table all the time. Maybe it’s the homebrew rules the DM has put into place. It could be an issue you have with another player. Maybe it’s the poor selections of snacks available to munch on during your sessions. Whatever the reason, sitting around letting it festering your head isn’t good for anyone, especially you. Letting those thoughts hang out in your brain rent-free can lead to resentment, anger, and quite possibly the burning desire to punch someone in the face. Please don’t.
It may feel uncomfortable, but you need to talk about it. If it’s a single individual, you can approach them and try to talk to them one-on-one. The thought of that scared the crap out of you, so ask your DM to mediate the conversation. If you plan on bringing your issues to the rest of the players before you talk to the individual in question, make sure you tell them that you did when you speak to that person. No one likes to think people are talking about them behind their back. Start the conversation by letting them know who you talked to because it could all be for naught if they find out later. They may be the ones harboring resentment later.
If you’re having issues with homebrew rules, talk to the table first. Ask them if anyone else feels the same way you do. If they do, you can bring it to the DM’s attention as a group and hash it out. If not, you may need to spend time reflecting on why it bothers you so much. It’s hard to do, but realize that the problem could be you. It’s not fun when you come to that conclusion, but if you drill down about realize this in a moment of true self-reflection, then you can move forward and, hopefully, figure out how to move past it. You can also talk to the DM privately, but I’d recommend spending the time working on yourself before bringing it to them.
And if it’s the snacks, stop being a cheap ass and buy your own.
Find a new DM
This one can be difficult. Finding a DM is hard enough, but having multiple options can prove damn near impossible. If you live in a remote or rural area, I understand your options are limited. It’s easier than ever to find a game online, as Covid has led to an explosion of people playing on Fantasy Grounds, Roll20, and others. There always seem to be groups looking for players, which is a nice change from how it was in the past. I know I said I’m not a fan of online play, but that’s me. You should decide for yourself if it works for you, and if it does, you have additional options available to you.
Make sure not to burn your bridges if you go this route. Explain to the DM that you’ve found a new group and want to give it a try. This way, if you decide down the road to ask to re-join your original table, they won’t tell you to piss off. Most people will understand and harbor no ill will. Those that act like jerks and get offended aren’t people you want to play with anyways.
Take a Break
There’s nothing wrong with taking a break from TTRPGs altogether. That’s what I did. Although I’m still writing almost every day, I stopped playing for a few weeks. I let the DM and the rest of the table know they understood, and I’m currently taking a short sabbatical. I’m playing a ton of board games, including Pandemic Legacy, Harry Potter, and Parks, to name a few. If you’ve never heard of Parks, check it out. The art is beautiful, and it’s a fun game that takes around 30 minutes. I can already feel the itch to get back to playing, and my table has said they will welcome me back with open arms whenever. It’ll be soon.
Playing D&D should be fun. If it’s not, take the time to figure out why and put a plan into action. Worst case scenario, you end up not playing for longer than you planned. You may find a new game you love, a new group to play with that matches your style, or head back to your first group of friends with an amazing character you can’t wait to play.
If you like our articles, love homebrew, and are looking for a fun and active community to talk about all things D&D, consider supporting us on Patreon. Below are some of the benefits we offer:
Access to our Homebrew Horde with over 300 items and counting!
Vote on upcoming Deep Deep topics
Monthly online one-shot adventures
Early access to Deep Dive and Rewind Articles
Even more Homebrew in our Magic Item Monday and Monster Thursday series
More to come!
